What To Expect When Dating In Sobriety

What To Expect When Dating In Sobriety

Recovering from any addiction is a very long and challenging process. Many are learning how to live without the substances that made them function daily. Over the course of this addition, the drinks and drugs may have deeply intertwined with activities like relaxation, hobbies, and spending time with family. Once the sobriety sets in, there’s an awareness of how they could not function appropriately when they were under the influence.

Another thing to keep into consideration is romance. People who have just experienced being sober may not know how to act or perform in a relationship at first. Fortunately, there are dating sites for sober people that are available on the web. It can be awkward at first, but with the right person and the support groups that still have his back, he can be the best version to be the second time around.

There’s also the first time a couple meets, and the alcohol is there in the dating culture. What some recovering couples should do is to prefer coffee over gin and refraining about this when asked. Another thing is that they should honestly tell the other person that they are on the road to recovery, and they would love it if they can skip these drinks or that for this first meet-up.

It’s always fortunate that people can date nowadays without the need to use alcohol and drugs. Many have managed to find love without the need to compromise their new values and sobriety. Some who have celebrated anniversaries have tips on how it would be when you’re in this situation.

Know Yourself and Determine When You’re Ready

What To Expect When Dating In Sobriety

Transitioning is a terrifying move, but the first thing that you need to see is if you’re ready for the dating scene. You don’t have to force a relationship, especially if you feel that you need a lot of time for yourself.

The early phases of recovery are going to take some time. The first years are going to be lonely because alcohol as the company is no longer available. Others may seek companions and relationships during this time to feel that rush of dopamine once again.

This is the time where many of the losses will occur. The loss of alcohol, drinking buddies, the pleasure that the whiskey has brought into one’s life, and the great feeling of being able to forget everything. With this said, it can be tempting to turn into a new romance to prevent feelings of loneliness.

However, many communities recommend abstaining during the first year of sobriety. It will help you focus on your goals, and you can guard yourself against temptations during the holidays. You won’t need to have that “taste” and “accidental” high from drugs just because you want to please a possible romantic partner.

Know that this rule is not set in stone. Many people may feel that they are ready to go out with others in the first year and have made a significant change in their lifestyles. They are reaping the benefits of trying to stay sober, have secured jobs, and are loved by their families, their friends are proud of them, and they are starting to get the financial freedom they know they deserve. Read more about overcoming addiction on this link here.

This is all fine, but others are willing to wait much longer than a year to see how they will face bad and difficult situations in their lives. They are still working on themselves without the need to drag other people into their issues. When they know how to become strong alone, then this is the right time.

Expectations on the First Meeting

What To Expect When Dating In Sobriety

You may have to put a lot of effort, time, and money into the road to recovery, and you feel that you’re perfectly capable of handling a healthy relationship. If you’ve met someone whom you want to have dinner with, what are the things that you should expect?

The answer to this is that you may have feelings of awkwardness, and you may be shy at first. You aren’t sure how to behave and what to say in the first place. For many years, many people would go on a date simply because there’s alcohol involved. They may not like the other person, but no one cares because alcohol can always fix things up.

However, sobriety may mean insecurities and anxieties that many are becoming aware of. There’s no alcohol to mask the awkward silences, and everything is out in the open. When there are no crutches to hold on to, all you have is yourself, and this is where you may want to know if you are going to be the one for the other person.

Be honest when you’re coping because it’s perfectly okay to be not okay at a given time. You don’t want to set false expectations about the entire thing and enjoy the night. This may be easier to say, and many others will have a hard time doing this. However, being the person you are instead of pretending to be someone else will be uplifting, and you’ll reduce your chances of crawling deep into the bottle again when few feelings are invested.

Things to Do and Not Do

What To Expect When Dating In Sobriety

When it’s time to plan everything, you may want to get into an area where the temptation to drink is far away. You should never test yourself by going into bars because they will have a strong pull for you.

Set yourself up for success every time, and it helps to get creative. Go with restaurants in your area where you can have coffee or be on a launch date. On warm summer nights, you may want to talk at a local park and rediscover your interests. Others are getting into hobbies like snow skiing and book reading with their newfound “friends,” which can develop into something else in the long run. It’s essential not to rush things.

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